The past 3 weeks, my two teens and I were battling COVID.
As a single mom, taking care of my kids and sick myself, on a few of those days, I truly thought I was going to fold.
With Easter approaching, my son was just starting to feel better, while I was getting worse, and my daughter was going through a 3 week in isolation, emotional roller coaster.
On Easter Sunday, my daughter woke up singing, got all dressed up, and was inspiring herself to make it a great day. I made a special breakfast for the kids, but into the day, a growing headache was so intense, I had to go lay back down instead of spearheading our make shift day of celebration. My daughter quietly took our two small dogs, closed my curtains and let me sleep all afternoon.
After a few hours of lying down, I found it hard to move, headache severe, blurry vision & with complete brain fog! I was apparently dehydrated, and I thought I needed to call 911. I called on God instead.
I was emotionally, mentally, and physically drained, and on this day in particular, I was simply depleted. Thinking of the pressure to be there for my kids, I had to pray, and ask God for help. All I kept hearing in return was "GET UP!" Just get up!
I had flashbacks of other times that I have overcome struggles and tried to remind myself, "This too shall pass", and that I have survived much worse. As I continued to cry in despair, I then reminded myself of a meme I made of myself saying: "My greatest strength, is finding strength". * And I'm not a big fan of hypocrites. I knew in that moment I was choosing which example I was going to set for my kids. I had to find that strength! I knew what that meant for me in the past. I was able to find that strength deep within, in times where I had to surrender and let God lead the way. Note to self, this was just one of those times to make it happen again.
Those positive thoughts and inspiring images were quickly replaced with "I'm even tired of being the strong one! And I'm too weak to get up, yet AGAIN. I cried. And I prayed again.
Thinking of my mom's poem hanging in our kitchen growing up, FOOTPRINTS, in tears, I told God "I surrender! Please God, I'm out of every last bit of physical, emotional & mental strength. I am honestly scared! And today, I need you to carry me!" I was not ashamed to say that I couldn't do it myself!
Again I heard "Just get up!... I've got it from here!"
So I slowly rolled over, got some Gatorade *which I believe saved my life!... and I got up! I did every recommended step possible to get better, and pulled myself together. I showered and we just jumped in the car and let the road lead us.
We had dinner in the car, with many little funny moments and lots of laughter. We kept wiggling our way down the Hudson until we found a spot with not a single soul around and got some much needed fresh air. We appreciated the beautiful city view, and amazing, warm, still weather. We stood outside and we just breathed!
After 3 weeks of fighting COVID, and my headaches aside, we had a fun, memorable Easter! For the sake of my children, I thank God for carrying me through it that day!
In all I ever experience, I always feel the need to share my lessons. I believe creating means nothing until we're cultivating. In the weeks of stillness and silence, while being sick, I created several new materials and opportunities for us to grow. One outcome is I realized one of my books in progress, "Mamma's Canzone", would be perfect for a Play Bill, which I hope to have ready to submit by the end of the year.
Another, more immediate outcome, is I'm now working on my 4th Life Lessons - Play Book, called The Strength Within. Here I'm sharing a collection of quotes, song lyrics, and bible verses, as were shared with me, that gave me my Roots & Wings.
*Including the reminders I provided myself to JUST GET UP last week.
I'm a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, however, I also know God gives us choices. Sometimes that choice is which step to take, taking a first step, or even the choice of when we fall down, to JUST GET UP!