Growing up I was made fun of and heard these things repeat over & over again in my head:
"Your smile's like the Joker!"
" You've got a big mouth & all gums!"
" You have such big, bug eyes!"
" Your big nose looks like Gonzo from the muppets!"
" You have a big forehead!"
" You have such big ears!"
" Your hairline looks like Eddie from the Munsters!"
" You have rabbit teeth!"
all of which, I used to look in the mirror and just be so darn hard on myself and believed all the negative comments, all the way until I was 42 years old! ( I'm now 48! ).
But because this happened...
My daughter started to grow up. As she did, everyone would tell us how she's really starting to look like me. Her big eyes, smile, shape of her face..
One day I was driving with her in the front seat for the first time, 6 years ago, and I looked over at her getting so grown up, and I was staring! I thought to myself, WOW! She really IS so darn beautiful!
That night, as I was staring in the mirror taking off my makeup, I started to be hard on myself as usual:
- ugh, chin hairs!
- ugh, where did that double chin come from?
- ugh, bags under my eyes!
- ugh, jowls? What the heck?
Then I stopped myself in my tracks! Who are you looking at you imbecile? Your beautiful daughter looks just like you! That means that YOU are beautiful too!
So I closed my eyes, took in a long, slow breath, told myself I'm beautiful too, then opened my eyes back up & stared at myself in the mirror. This time, seeing someone different.
This time I smiled. Even giggled with remembering EXACTLY WHO told me all of these POSITIVE things over the same four decades:
"You have amazing eyelashes!"
" Your smile is so genuine!"
" You have such white teeth!"
" Your energy is so infectious!"
" Your eyes look so magical"
" You have great shaped brows!
" You do your makeup so pretty!"
" You don't ever need makeup, you have natural beauty!"
" Your gestures are so sexy!"
" Your face tells such great stories!"
" You're such a beautiful creature!"
I ran all the compliments I ever heard over the years through my head, and after looking at my daughter, seeing her in me, this was the very first time, in 42 years, I actually believed them! Up until then, it was so much easier to believe the negative things about me, then the positive.
Now, if I look in the mirror and see things I don't like, like thinning eyebrows, chin hairs, bags under my eyes...
I just laugh and tell myself my own advice: "Control what you can control".
I do quick fixes & touch ups. Take extra time to clean or whiten. But for what God gave me: my eyes, my lashes, my nose, my mouth, my gums, my teeth... and how I look at myself and others, how I treat myself and others, how I carry myself...
I look in the mirror every single day & say: You are the example to your daughter. She is beautiful, and YOU are beautiful!
Now go kick some assets today!
I no longer hear those negative comments. I've learned to let go of any negative people and their comments of days past, and only surround myself by the ones who help lift me up. I focus on and carry all the positive compliments with me, ringing in my ears, to allow an extra pep in my step.